Ode to a Crockpot
Well, I call it a crockpot, you may call it a slowcooker, but my Mom called it a crockpot, and I'm sticking with that.
I don't know about you guys, but I think the crockpot is one of the best inventions EVER. I'm amazed that everyone doesn't own one, but sadly, I know some of you don't. But that's all gonna change. You're gonna want to run right out and buy one after reading my blog. Even if it's 3am, you're gonna brave the mutants at Wal-mart, just to buy your very own. Well, I guess some of you freaks might not like juicy, buttery, falling apart pot roasts, and if not, in the words of my sweet little nephew, Jayden… I'm not your friend anymore.
I've used my crockpot to fix pot roasts for years, and I even thought the ones I made were tasty, until my dad showed me the error of my ways. I had always just thrown the roast in the pot, put in some water or beef broth, and some Lipton's Onion soup mix. I'd chop up some carrots and potatoes, etc and throw them in, too. Then I'd cook the hell out of it for 8 hours or so. Yeah, I know it sounds lazy, but that's the whole purpose of the crockpot!!! Anyway, what I would get was a watery roast with mushy vegetables that tasted like…. watery roast. It was edible, but now I know I had been led astray. Listen up peoples, I'm gonna show you the light.
Now, this is what you're gonna need to know before you head down to Wal-mart to buy your ingredients.
First of all, my method of picking out a roast was flawed. I would just
pick the most expensive roast per pound, cause I figured it had to have the best taste. WRONG! I would pick one that had the least amount of fat on it, cause I thought I was supposed to. WRONG! In this case, fat is good. Now, I don't mean a LOT of fat. Marbling is best, actually. Now I actually pick the LEAST expensive roast I can find, which is usually Rump Roast. Okay, that's lesson one.
I don't know about you guys, but I think the crockpot is one of the best inventions EVER. I'm amazed that everyone doesn't own one, but sadly, I know some of you don't. But that's all gonna change. You're gonna want to run right out and buy one after reading my blog. Even if it's 3am, you're gonna brave the mutants at Wal-mart, just to buy your very own. Well, I guess some of you freaks might not like juicy, buttery, falling apart pot roasts, and if not, in the words of my sweet little nephew, Jayden… I'm not your friend anymore.
I've used my crockpot to fix pot roasts for years, and I even thought the ones I made were tasty, until my dad showed me the error of my ways. I had always just thrown the roast in the pot, put in some water or beef broth, and some Lipton's Onion soup mix. I'd chop up some carrots and potatoes, etc and throw them in, too. Then I'd cook the hell out of it for 8 hours or so. Yeah, I know it sounds lazy, but that's the whole purpose of the crockpot!!! Anyway, what I would get was a watery roast with mushy vegetables that tasted like…. watery roast. It was edible, but now I know I had been led astray. Listen up peoples, I'm gonna show you the light.
Now, this is what you're gonna need to know before you head down to Wal-mart to buy your ingredients.
First of all, my method of picking out a roast was flawed. I would just
pick the most expensive roast per pound, cause I figured it had to have the best taste. WRONG! I would pick one that had the least amount of fat on it, cause I thought I was supposed to. WRONG! In this case, fat is good. Now, I don't mean a LOT of fat. Marbling is best, actually. Now I actually pick the LEAST expensive roast I can find, which is usually Rump Roast. Okay, that's lesson one.
Lesson two: Invest in some oven bags. For those of you that have never used them, you don't know what you've been missing. My mom has always used them for turkeys, chicken, etc… No need for basting, turning or fussing with your food when you use them. They keep all the juices inside the bag, with your meat. Best of all, you aren't left with a messy pan to clean up. Woohoo!
Tres: Yukon Gold Potatoes. Mmmmm For years, I always bought Idaho baking potatoes or Russet or whatever I could find. But these little babies are YUM-MY.
Onions… well, pretty much any onion will do, I suppose. Carrots, same thing. Well, I buy the peeled baby carrots, cause I'm lazy. I also fix mushrooms with my roast sometimes.
Oh, a tip about mushrooms. A few years ago, I found out that my method of cleaning mushrooms was the opposite of how you should actually clean them. I used to just run them under water and then clean them with a wet paper towel. WRONG! Mushrooms absorb water. So, when they turned out all mushy and watery and I wonder why… ding! The correct way to clean a mushroom is to use a damp towel. Yeah, it's a pain in the ass.
Quatro: Seasonings!!! Tony Chachere's Spice and Herb seasoning. Mmmmm It's a little spicy, I gotta warn ya. Montreal Steak Seasoning, which is basically pepper. Lawry's Seasoning Salt. I love this stuff on pretty much everything. Garlic, cause my dad taught me to put garlic in EVERYthing. If you don't want to buy fresh garlic, just buy the minced stuff, or hell, just use garlic powder. I've done both. Oh, you're gonna need some olive oil.
Shopping is done! Now go home and wash off that Wal-mart smell.
Now the good part…..
Put your oven bag inside your crockpot.
Rinse and dry your roast. While you are doing that, heat up a skillet with a little bit of olive oil in the pan. Now, drizzle a bit of olive oil on your roast and then use your fingers to make sure it's all coated. Next, sprinkle the following on all sides of the roast: Tony Chachere's seasoning, some salt (I use Lawry's Seasoning Salt) and the Montreal Steak Seasoning. Now rub it into the meat. It should stick pretty well.
Now your pan should be ready. Brown the roast on all sides for at least a minute or so, and then transfer it to the oven bag.
Oh, a tip about mushrooms. A few years ago, I found out that my method of cleaning mushrooms was the opposite of how you should actually clean them. I used to just run them under water and then clean them with a wet paper towel. WRONG! Mushrooms absorb water. So, when they turned out all mushy and watery and I wonder why… ding! The correct way to clean a mushroom is to use a damp towel. Yeah, it's a pain in the ass.
Quatro: Seasonings!!! Tony Chachere's Spice and Herb seasoning. Mmmmm It's a little spicy, I gotta warn ya. Montreal Steak Seasoning, which is basically pepper. Lawry's Seasoning Salt. I love this stuff on pretty much everything. Garlic, cause my dad taught me to put garlic in EVERYthing. If you don't want to buy fresh garlic, just buy the minced stuff, or hell, just use garlic powder. I've done both. Oh, you're gonna need some olive oil.
Shopping is done! Now go home and wash off that Wal-mart smell.
Now the good part…..
Put your oven bag inside your crockpot.
Rinse and dry your roast. While you are doing that, heat up a skillet with a little bit of olive oil in the pan. Now, drizzle a bit of olive oil on your roast and then use your fingers to make sure it's all coated. Next, sprinkle the following on all sides of the roast: Tony Chachere's seasoning, some salt (I use Lawry's Seasoning Salt) and the Montreal Steak Seasoning. Now rub it into the meat. It should stick pretty well.
Now your pan should be ready. Brown the roast on all sides for at least a minute or so, and then transfer it to the oven bag.
Close the lid to your crockpot, turn it on low and then forget about it for about 6-8 hours.
Now I know you're all thinking, "But Kimberly, you forgot to put the vegetables in with the roast!" Nope, didn't forget. First of all, if you cook a potato for 8 hours, even in a slow cooker, it's gonna be a mushy, mealy mess. Secondly, I want my potato to taste like a potato, not roast. So…..
About an hour or so before you plan to take your roast out of the crockpot, do the following:
Preheat your oven to 350. (Reid objects to the term "pre-heat", he says there is no "pre" heating, only heating. Whatever!)
Put your oven bag in your baking dish. I use a 9x13 cake pan, because my 9x13 glass baking dish had a little accident (See previous blog: Final Destination) Drizzle in some olive oil.
Sidenote: I don't know how many vegetables you like with your roast, but I like a BUNCH, so sometimes I use TWO baking dishes for the veggies. It could also have something to do with me having to segregate my vegetables due to Reid not eating anything but potatoes, and that he'd rather go to a Toby Keith concert than to eat a carrot. (Keisha, that was just for you. Haha)
Peel and quarter your potatoes.
Peel and half your onions.
Open the bag of baby carrots (see! Now aren't you glad I'm lazy?)
Grab the mushrooms and a damp towel and take them to the kitchen table where you can spend the next 30 minutes wiping uhmmm "dirt" off of them. But you'll be sitting down, by God!
Okay, this next part is optional. Heat up your skillet with a little olive oil. Put your onions in the pan, cut side down, and brown them for about a minute. Flip them over and cook for another minute.
Now we're ready to put all of our yummy veggies in the oven bag. Because I'm lazy (if you haven't gotten the hint already), I wait until all of my veggies are in the bag before I season them. I sprinkle in some Lawry's Seasoning Salt and the Tony Chachere's seasoning, and then I kinda shake them around, so they are all coated with the olive oil and the seasoning. I also put in a couple tablespoons of butter.
Now close up your bag and put the baking dish in the oven for about an hour.
There ya go. That's it. Just be careful opening up the oven bags, cause they have a lot of steam inside. It only took 5 or 6 steam burns for me to remember THAT particular lesson.
Alrighty, then. Enjoy your yummy dinner and feel free to come back and worship me.
Now I know you're all thinking, "But Kimberly, you forgot to put the vegetables in with the roast!" Nope, didn't forget. First of all, if you cook a potato for 8 hours, even in a slow cooker, it's gonna be a mushy, mealy mess. Secondly, I want my potato to taste like a potato, not roast. So…..
About an hour or so before you plan to take your roast out of the crockpot, do the following:
Preheat your oven to 350. (Reid objects to the term "pre-heat", he says there is no "pre" heating, only heating. Whatever!)
Put your oven bag in your baking dish. I use a 9x13 cake pan, because my 9x13 glass baking dish had a little accident (See previous blog: Final Destination) Drizzle in some olive oil.
Sidenote: I don't know how many vegetables you like with your roast, but I like a BUNCH, so sometimes I use TWO baking dishes for the veggies. It could also have something to do with me having to segregate my vegetables due to Reid not eating anything but potatoes, and that he'd rather go to a Toby Keith concert than to eat a carrot. (Keisha, that was just for you. Haha)
Peel and quarter your potatoes.
Peel and half your onions.
Open the bag of baby carrots (see! Now aren't you glad I'm lazy?)
Grab the mushrooms and a damp towel and take them to the kitchen table where you can spend the next 30 minutes wiping uhmmm "dirt" off of them. But you'll be sitting down, by God!
Okay, this next part is optional. Heat up your skillet with a little olive oil. Put your onions in the pan, cut side down, and brown them for about a minute. Flip them over and cook for another minute.
Now we're ready to put all of our yummy veggies in the oven bag. Because I'm lazy (if you haven't gotten the hint already), I wait until all of my veggies are in the bag before I season them. I sprinkle in some Lawry's Seasoning Salt and the Tony Chachere's seasoning, and then I kinda shake them around, so they are all coated with the olive oil and the seasoning. I also put in a couple tablespoons of butter.
Now close up your bag and put the baking dish in the oven for about an hour.
There ya go. That's it. Just be careful opening up the oven bags, cause they have a lot of steam inside. It only took 5 or 6 steam burns for me to remember THAT particular lesson.
Alrighty, then. Enjoy your yummy dinner and feel free to come back and worship me.
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